Long time no blog, I know. It’s been hard for me to express my feelings because they change so dramatically so often.
Ive had a very busy week, with a little bit of everything happening. Uni has been ok, went on a field trip on Tuesday (which involved sitting in a bus, then walking around looking at peoples houses) and a quiz (well exam) on Thursday. So as you could expect the weekend was a welcome relief.
I was a couch potato for a bit of it watching chic flicks including Bridget Jones’ Diary! I was a football (AFL) fanatic for a bit of the weekend too watching the swans smash Carlton!! Went out to one of my favorite club/ nightclubs on Sat night in Gymea Tradies- its interesting to be there on a different perspective: a sober one. I worked too, and that was fun coz I got to catch up with someone I hadn’t seen for a long time. She gave me a lift home- well her mom did, which saved me walking home!! I was so tired and pretty dead I don’t think I could have made it walking. And church was cool, someone was meant to pick me up and she forgot so I had to get my dad off the couch, and I was late! I was a little upset over that with a combination of other things, so I didn’t talk to her at church. A little sad over that but I think im fine.
Ive been kept busy with so many things, but I’m finding it hard in general. Im losing my identity as a person, I don’t know who I am or what im becoming. It seems im living so many different lives. Nothing is integrative; my life consists of triangular shapes trying to fit into square holes. My Church life seems to be so moralistic, trying to repent all I have done wrong and bad habits in which I still struggle with. I want to become a better person but I am changing my ways more so because this new community, which I have become a part of, are good people constantly trying to better themselves for the love of God. I am trying to do good so I will not be judged by these people and that I may identify with them. I am not doing it purely because of the love of God- which is pretty much the purpose of going to church. Im definitely struggling with it.
I pray that I may be guided and that my friends may continue doing what they have always done for me. They all know how much they mean to me even if I don’t show it all the time.
Till Next Time,
Robbie
Ive had a very busy week, with a little bit of everything happening. Uni has been ok, went on a field trip on Tuesday (which involved sitting in a bus, then walking around looking at peoples houses) and a quiz (well exam) on Thursday. So as you could expect the weekend was a welcome relief.
I was a couch potato for a bit of it watching chic flicks including Bridget Jones’ Diary! I was a football (AFL) fanatic for a bit of the weekend too watching the swans smash Carlton!! Went out to one of my favorite club/ nightclubs on Sat night in Gymea Tradies- its interesting to be there on a different perspective: a sober one. I worked too, and that was fun coz I got to catch up with someone I hadn’t seen for a long time. She gave me a lift home- well her mom did, which saved me walking home!! I was so tired and pretty dead I don’t think I could have made it walking. And church was cool, someone was meant to pick me up and she forgot so I had to get my dad off the couch, and I was late! I was a little upset over that with a combination of other things, so I didn’t talk to her at church. A little sad over that but I think im fine.
Ive been kept busy with so many things, but I’m finding it hard in general. Im losing my identity as a person, I don’t know who I am or what im becoming. It seems im living so many different lives. Nothing is integrative; my life consists of triangular shapes trying to fit into square holes. My Church life seems to be so moralistic, trying to repent all I have done wrong and bad habits in which I still struggle with. I want to become a better person but I am changing my ways more so because this new community, which I have become a part of, are good people constantly trying to better themselves for the love of God. I am trying to do good so I will not be judged by these people and that I may identify with them. I am not doing it purely because of the love of God- which is pretty much the purpose of going to church. Im definitely struggling with it.
I pray that I may be guided and that my friends may continue doing what they have always done for me. They all know how much they mean to me even if I don’t show it all the time.
Till Next Time,
Robbie
posted by Robbie at
6:17 PM
1 Comments:
ROBIN
This is GOD
Its ok to cry sometimes, you are not losing your identity my son but are treading the path of true enlightment. I can see you as the next pope if you continue with your baptist church commitments.
with love your friend God
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Anonymous, at 3:20 PM
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